Episode #22: Becoming "That Girl"

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I want to dive into a topic that has been buzzing in the world of social media and personal development—the concept of becoming "that girl." It's an intriguing idea that has captivated many women, but it also raises questions about empowerment and authenticity. Let's explore both sides and see how we can embrace elements of that girl archetype while staying true to ourselves.

Discovering That Girl

I stumbled upon the idea of "that girl" while scrolling through Pinterest during the influencer era of social media. The images showcased women flawlessly going about their everyday lives, with impeccable outfits, flawless skin, and a sense of perfection. It's no wonder we are drawn to this aesthetic—it represents the desire to become put-together and disciplined.

However, it's important to remember that social media presents a curated version of reality. We see the clean, polished images, but behind the scenes, there may be messy dishes and piles of laundry. This realization made me curious about the true meaning behind the "that girl" concept.

Unpacking That Girl Archetype

Upon delving deeper, I discovered that the essence of that girl revolves around intense self-care. It involves cultivating habits and routines that promote physical well-being and a stylized appearance. While this focus on self-care can be empowering, it often neglects the messiness of life.

Self-Care Routines: More Than Meets the Eye

When we think of self-care, we often envision physical activities like skincare and fitness routines. However, self-care encompasses emotional, mental, social, and spiritual aspects too. "That girl" archetype primarily emphasizes the physical side of self-care, presenting it in an aesthetically pleasing manner.

Advantages of the That Girl Movement

Let's explore the positive aspects of embracing elements of the that girl archetype:

1. Reframing Self-Care: That girl movement encourages us to reframe self-care, appearance, and our aesthetic. It invites us to show up in the world with self-love and kindness, valuing ourselves enough to invest time and effort into our appearance.

2. Setting Strong Boundaries: Adopting elements of that girl archetype helps us establish routines and habits. By curating these practices to align with our desired aesthetic, we create intentional boundaries that positively impact our lives.

3. Improving Hygiene: Taking care of our physical appearance is part of self care, and the "that girl" archetype reminds us to be intentional about it. Whether it's following a skincare routine, maintaining good hygiene, or enhancing our style, paying attention to our appearance can boost our confidence and overall well-being.

The Challenges of the That Girl Archetype

While there are advantages to embracing the "that girl" archetype, it's crucial to acknowledge the potential downsides:

1. Never Fully Satisfying: Even when we play the part, it can still feel like we're pretending. Embracing the "that girl" lifestyle requires ongoing commitment and consistency, which can be challenging to maintain.

2. Potential for Discouragement: Building habits takes time and effort. The continuous nature of the "that girl" archetype can lead to feelings of inadequacy or discouragement when we struggle to keep up with the aesthetic standards. Remember to be compassionate with yourself as you build any self care habits.

3. Lack of Authenticity: The "that girl" archetype doesn't leave much room for human imperfections. If we become too caught up in the illusion, we may start feeling inadequate or even experience imposter syndrome. It's crucial to embrace our humanness and remember that true confidence and self-love come from accepting and navigating life's messiness.


Incorporating elements of the "that girl" archetype can be a fun and empowering journey. However, it's essential to strike a balance between self-care, aesthetics, and authenticity. Remember that you are lovable and enough just as you are. It's not about changing the outside to transform the inside; it's about nurturing your inner self and letting that guide the changes you make in your life.

XO,

Ellie Curry