Struggling with Motivation in College

I remember sitting in my dorm at F.I.T. (The Fashion Institute of Technology) watching my roommates running around being productive as I sat on my bed watching TV, and all I could think was why am I not as motivated as they are!?! From there, I would make lists, write out calendars with all my goals on it, make meal plans, and then I would feel like I failed when I didn’t accomplish everything (talk about being a perfectionist!). I would continue to do this for many years, often feeling defeated.

My First Big Win with a Flexible Goal

Then a couple years later in the fall one of my favorite workout company’s Tone It Up! was doing a fall cardio challenge, 100 miles in 13 weeks. I had to do around 8 miles per week and for the first time, I had accomplished my fitness goal. I still remember how excited I was as I finished the challenge.

Why Flexible Goals Actually Work

So what made this goal different from the others I had set for myself? Well, it wasn’t as rigid as the other goals. I noticed when I was making myself do something every day or on specific days it would be too rigid and if I missed a day I would feel like I failed. This was more flexible—it didn’t matter which days I ran or how long I ran each time, as long as at the end of the week I accomplished the 8 miles.

Finding My Flow with Blogging and TV

Once I figured this out, I started to write my blog posts this way. I love to come home at the end of my day and watch TV. However, I started to feel very guilty about spending this time watching TV. I realized that I have been doing this for most of my life. I would always do homework while watching TV or listening to the radio. It was a mix of being productive while being relaxed. I needed to be in a relaxed setting to do my work. Now I will have the TV or radio on in the background as I write my posts. This way, I am still being productive, but I am not stressing about it. There are no hard deadlines or specific days I have to write; I can write when I feel like it. When I realized that this was the best way to work for me, it freed me from the guilt of watching TV.

Redefining Productivity for You

When you learn how to reframe productivity so it aligns with who you are, it starts to quiet self-judgment. This gives you the freedom to actually focus on taking the action needed instead of spiraling into self-doubt.