Episode #25: On A Mission To Fix Yourself?

Read or Listen!

Hey there, it's Ellie Curry! Let's have a heart-to-heart conversation about something that has been on my mind lately—how to fix ourselves. At the beginning of my personal development journey, I was convinced that I needed fixing. But as I've grown and learned, I've come to realize that this mindset can keep us stuck and prevent us from truly embracing who we are. So today, I want to share my thoughts on shifting from self-fixation to self-acceptance and love.

Breaking The Cycle of Self-Hatred

When we see ourselves as broken, it creates a heavy and daunting narrative. Society bombards us with messages that we are never enough, especially when it comes to our appearance. We don't need to add to that pressure by believing that we are fundamentally broken and in need of fixing. Trust me, nobody is broken.

In the past, my low self-esteem stemmed from the belief that certain aspects of myself were unlovable and unworthy. I thought that I had to fix these things to become worthy of love and acceptance. But the more I tried to fix myself through self-criticism and harsh judgments, the more I realized that it was an unfulfilling cycle that only reinforced feelings of brokenness.

Embracing Self-Kindness

To break free from this cycle, I had to acknowledge that yelling at myself and being hard on myself was not the solution. I needed kindness and love from within. This concept of self-love seemed radical to me because I was so accustomed to self-hate. But I knew I had to give it a try.

I reached out to the amazing women in my life, subtly asking them about the positive qualities they saw in me. I compiled a list of these qualities and read it every single day. It was a way for me to practice self-kindness and start shifting my perspective. Instead of focusing on the negatives, I began to embrace the positive aspects that others saw in me.

Embracing Self-Acceptance

The journey of self-acceptance was the most challenging part for me. I struggled to wrap my head around the idea that accepting a part of myself that I deemed flawed meant saying it was okay. But I realized that true growth requires acceptance. We can't evolve if we're constantly in fix-it mode, trying to erase parts of ourselves as quickly as possible.

Society often encourages us to view certain areas of our lives as problems that need immediate deletion. But instead of trying to delete those parts, we should acknowledge their existence and show ourselves compassion. It's about finding peace within ourselves, embracing what is, and slowing down the rush to change. This shift allows us to create a supportive, sustainable, and compassionate space for growth.

Choosing Self-Love Over Self-Hate

Ultimately, the goal is to shift from self-hate to self-love. What's the point of living if we're constantly battling against ourselves? I believe that deep down, we all crave a peaceful and calm experience, a safe space to exist in. I know I do, which is why I decided to do this inner work.

So, let's challenge the notion of fixing ourselves and instead focus on accepting and loving ourselves. Embrace kindness, find the positives, and be gentle with yourself. Choose self-love over self-hate, and create a life that is supportive, compassionate, and aligned with who you truly are.

Remember, my friend, you are not broken. You are worthy of love and acceptance exactly as you are. Embrace your journey of self-acceptance and let self-love guide you towards a fulfilling and peaceful life.

XO,

Ellie Curry